solo

I love this picture. It captures much of my life here. The city streets, bus lanes, rain, waiting, alone.

Thanks to Miss Sidi Crute, I have a picture worth, well, at least a few words.

One thing I think about a lot here is the idea of "growing as a person." During our orientation this phrase was tossed around often and I believe we got too comfortable with it. It was used as a neat response to questions like, "why did you decide to teach abroad?" or "what do you want to accomplish here?" I remember feeling like this was a cliché answer, too vague to pinpoint an individual's true reasons. "Grow as a person" sounds nice, but qué significa?

Last weekend, another volunteer came down to Conce and we were talking about her experiences in Costa Rica. (She lived in there for a year doing World Teach in a very rural pueblito.) After talking about isolation and boredom, she said, "well, you grow from those experiences, you know?" At the time I agreed with the typical "yeah," and we moved on but that phrase has been stuck in my head this week.

Grow as a person.

There is an inherent individuality connected to this use of grow. It seems impossible to talk about what it means without immediately giving individual examples. ...guess what individual it is easiest to talk about? :)

Thinking back to high school, I definitely see a difference in my perspective and outlook on life. Obviously I've changed. There are countless experiences between now and then that have made me think differently (for better or worse) about the world. For example, my trip to Honduras the summer before Olaf made me realize I wanted to major in Spanish and one day live in a Spanish-speaking country. (livin' the dream, I tell ya!) Also, the four additional years of soccer I played at Olaf are some of my favorite memories. I learned how to work hard for something I wanted, how to humbly accept defeat, balance school and sports, work with a group toward a common goal. And my senior year I learned that leadership is constant.

Working at Camp Knutson I learned how unbelievably blessed I am to have my health. To be able to run, be in the sun, be independent. I met physically weak kids with more gumption and emotional strength than many adults. I also learned how to organize and lead under stress and with many different personality types. Kate called me a "calm, steady eagle."

In the past 8 months, I have gained experience. I speak Spanish with more fluidity, I can teach a class of Chileans the difference between "wrote" and "was written," I feel comfortable navigating new cities, I know not to expect great things when it comes to cuisine and I've learned how to deal with cultural differences in my host family.

Do all of those things combined mean "grow as a person?" Like Captain Planet style? Are these experiences my "powers combined"?

All of this rambling has gotten me confused. I guess I'll have to continue mulling this one over. Who knows, maybe this very post has helped me grow as a person.